Meet n Grief
by freakkshoww
Summary: PewDieCry. Ryan lives in with his abusive father and the memory of his father. Ryan's father however doesn't physically abuse, usually. He's sadistic and loves to emotionally destroy Ryan to the verge of suicidal thoughts. Ella is Ryan's comfort tree. When Ella's cousin comes into town for summer, Ryan is going to find a new comfort tree. MATURE CONTENT. SMUT IS COMING. :)


**A/N: This is my first fanfic. Thought I try it out. Sorry if it's crappy.**

**Feel free to give feedback or ideas on what I should do. Thanks!**

_Sweat ran down his tense stomach, cold glistening with absolute terror._

_ Furiously and violently pulling and scratching at his bare skin, making the deep crimson blood gush with more crimson blood._

_ Desperately trying to keep his terrified body still, silently screaming in hopes he doesn't find him._

_ I didn't do anything wrong. Then again, everything I seem to do never pleases the damn bastard._

_ The floor boards creek with red fury._

"Come out you pathetic fucker!" _his voice was harsh and out for blood._

_Keep it together, Ryan. You got this. Don't fucking pussy out!_

"Your punishment will be far fucking worse if you don't come out from where you're little goddamn hiding spot." _his voice, soft, husky, mysterious._

_He doesn't sound all the mad anymore._

_ No Ryan. Don't you fucking fall for it! He's just trying to ease fake onto you._

"Ryan… son… Please don't do this to me. You know I'm not good at hide and seek like your mother was."

**_Mother…_**

_Tears filled Ryan's eye, depression falling over him like a circus tent._

_ Mom played hide and seek. That was game. She'd never hurt me._

_You, you're a __**disgusting**__ fucker._

_ Ryan let out a small whimper._

_Shit, Ryan, shit! Fucking why?!_

_Floor boards eerily creaked. Pain was coming, was all the floors said to Ryan._

_Ryan's door slammed opened with a force. He grabbed a fistful of all the hair he could and yanked Ryan out of the closet._

_Ryan struggled, clawing the man's wrist. Screaming, begging for everything to just end._

_He violently dragged Ryan to the stair case, slamming Ryan's body into anything that was his way._

"You're so goddamn pathetic. Just like you druggie shit mother was."

_Ryan screamed and cried._

"My mother wasn't a druggie! She was the best mother anyone could fucking ask for!"

_He cackled up the most heinous laugh._

"You think you mother actually **_LOVED_** you?!"

"She did… she did love me!"

"You're an idiot Ryan! If she loved you, she wouldn't be gone., she took her life because you were such an unstable emotional fuck!"

_All the might of the large man dragged Ryan down the stairs and left him at the bottom of the case._

_Ryan curled up and sobbed uncontrollably._

"You're an ungrateful fuck. You don't deserve anything she gave you. You don't even deserve what I fucking give you now."

_Ryan wakes the next morning with eyes full of pain, lies, and discomfort._

_He was unusually rough. What did I do to deserve what happened to me last night…_

"Get up Ryan."

He nudge Ryan's side just enough to flop Ryan over.

Aching Ryan reaches to his feet.

"I'm going to work and out to dinner. Usual, $20, food, and do whatcha what. Have fun."

Not anything fucking new, ditched the weekends. At least he gives me money to survive.

Aching with the thought of his mother not loving him, he slowly but surely walks to Ella's house.

Ella was a beautiful girl. Average height about 5 feet, gorgeous long blood red hair, elegant tan skin, and the personality of a sweet girl with an attitude, easily Ryan's best friend.

"Ryan!" Ella squealed with cheer.

"Oh hun, you look absolutely beat. Come in."

She takes Ryan's hand and swiftly leads him to the kitchen.

Ryan awkwardly sits and just stares down.

"Ryan… What's wrong?"

"Why am I such a fuck up? Why is everything I do just fucking wrong? Am I really just that bad of a goddamn person that everybody just wigs out on me?! What the fuck is wrong with me Ella?!" Ryan slams down in the counter and shoves the chair in front of Ella.

She grabs Ryan's hands and softly says, "Ryan, what happened that destroyed you so immensely?"

"He just got furious with me. I came home and he started screaming and yelling, which wasn't anything new."

Ryan paused to pick up the chair he almost hit Ella with.

"I-I'm sorry I almost just hit you with this."

"Don't be sorry. Come sit down."

Ella takes Ryan over to her couch and sits him down.

"Ryan, what did he do or tell you?"

"He tried playing those mind games, where he gets furious but changes his tone of voice as in everything's okay. He mentioned my mother. I cried, he found me, grabbed me hair and dragged me out. Hitting my body on everything we passed." Ryan winced and Ella put her hand over his beat up rib cage.

"He said it was pathetic like my mother, and said…" Ryan voice cracked and his vision became blurry.

".. He said my mother never loved me! He said my ended her life because I was so unstable! I was such a fuck up!" Ryan sobbed and sobbed into Ella's chest.

"Ryan, I promise you you're mother loved you. She adore everything thing about you. She cried when you were born because you were such an amazing baby to look at. Ryan, he's just angry because he lost her. He's taking his anger out on you because you're there and you're a spitting image of your mother. Ryan, he once loved you and I promise you he still loves you. He's just angry and depressed at the world for taking such an amazing and beautiful human being away."

Ryan's sobbing slowly started to calm down.

"Get some sleep Ryan, you look absolutely restless."

Ryan comforted by the warmth of Ella, exhausted, fell asleep with the words of Ella in his mind.

**_Ryan, I promise you you're mother loved you. She adored everything about you._**

**A/N: really hope you enjoyed this. Kind of intense and mature. PewDiePie will come! Definitely in the second chapter. This is just a setup. If I get feedback and good thing about this, I'll add another chapter and continue adding.**

**This is my own personal take on the story, not meaning to offend Ryan whatsoever. If he does see this and doesn't want it up, I will take it down. **

**Smut is also coming and so is more violence and mature stuff. Read and own risk! **

**Thank you so much. ****J**


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